The Human Heart

I long to put my arms around the world, but my arms are so small. There is too much suffering to hold.

I cried myself to sleep last night, and the night before too, because I can feel your pain so acutely, as if it were my own. The cold was so relentless that I thought I might die before the sun came up.

This endless suffering...
Is it yours, or is it ours?

I welcome the overwhelming pain of being alive. I too am afraid, but my arms are strong enough. Along with intense joy, and the merciful pause between each miraculous breath. Pain will not kill us, unless we repeatedly deny it.

Bring all your wounds and deep darks into that spaciousness. Drag it all into the light! I see you. I hear you. The child within is tugging at our shirts, deserving of our curious attention.

What else can I do, but listen to your telltale heart, and love anyway? All of you, and all of me, not just the pretty or pleasant parts. Not only what we choose to share with the rest of the world.

It has been said that practicing mindfulness will make everything hurt more, but matter less. I have no answers. This heart has no interest in editing or reframing or justifying. I’m too raw under the microscope of truth, deeply imperfect, and only want to love better.

Lub dub. 
Human. 
Lub dub. 
Human.

The heart remembers, as I remember you. Let’s reside in this place. An invitation:

“Love they neighbor as thyself.”

I accepted this invitation a long time ago, forgetting that first I must love myself. It has been here all along- this infinite and holy stream of love that doesn’t care what stories we tell ourselves about who we are, or what we deserve. Can you put your hand on your own tender heart and feel this?

Our collective heartbeat goes lub dub. This is the sound of love. This is us.

-HK

With gratitude for our Loveland group, and for the generosity of Matt Licata and Jeff Foster. Alchemy is not comfortable...not at all, but it is necessary.